Oh Elizabeth, we are not alone. I almost cried when I saw the title myself! I'm so touched that this resonated with you, thank you for your lovely comment ❤️
Every letter feels like a spark that brings me back to myself. This letter today is so aptly timed in my personal life of having founded a magazine and after three issues, choosing to close it. Finding acceptance that my illness does require me to choose between the things I love is grief and gratitude colliding. You feature so many wonderful and interesting women who struggle in the same way as I do. It makes me feel like my illness doesn't have to be all I see of myself.
Yes I totally feel that 'grief and gratitude' experience. It's a hard one to accept at times, and it's ok to grieve what we have lost. Sometimes it makes me feel deeply sad, but more often I feel glad to live in a different way. Without having 'lost' my career, and all that went along with it, I would not have found writing, this community, and wonderful people who share such similar life experiences. I would have continued battling in a world that didn't quite fit. We are so much more than our illnesses, but we are also connected deeply in our shared understanding ❤️
yes, exactly, Emma! I'm often reminding myself that my illness does not get to take my entire identity hostage, and over time, writing has been a way to walk myself back to who I am, even if it looks a bit different now
Yes! Fasting makes me hangry! Also I’ve heard casually that studies on fasting (unsurprisingly) regularly don’t feature female subjects, and the female body may react very differently than the male body. I haven’t looked into this but seems totally possible.
Fasting and sound baths send me spiraling but binaural sounds and as of this week green noise work really well. Its interesting what resonates with us and what doesnt.
Aah thanks so much Rachel, it was a joy speaking with you. It’s very spooky that this has come out today as I’m on holiday - and actually had a couple of pre-scheduled posts. Today’s one is all about larks vs owls and my acceptance that I am not a morning person. Look forward to listening to this! I’m very grateful to have been invited for the conversation 💕🙏
Thank you Rachel and Emma for a rich conversation. Although I am mostly a lark, I strongly believe that for Ladies (& others) with Illness less ‘should’ is the tonic to apply. If your body wants to be an owl, then have at it. Ditto for meditation or controlled breathing or eating greens! I know someone whose GI issues were made worse by her attempt to eat greens, when she needed a low residue diet (at the time). Glad to hear so many different versions of what works, and all presented with a cautious ‘well this is what’s working for me just now’ rather than a universal prescription. Yay fir your book, Emma.
Loved loved loved listening to this! I’m a huge fan of Emma Simpson after discovering her on here. Brilliant to hear her voice. I haven’t listened to my own yet on here but I really want to.
A wellness practice that I haven’t taken to (even though i know it would help and I have used it in times of desperation 😆) is nostril breathing (as in the one where you press your finger on one nostril and breathe through one at a time). It’s really good for resting, helping you sleep - apparently 🙃
For me the whole wellness practice is about meeting yourself where you’re at, listening to your body, doing what you can when you can. Not what the wellness industry tells you you should be doing. That is something different entirely.
Yes! Its a toolbox we can pick and choose from. Its when the shoulds comes in that it gets on my nerves. We are all so different. Not a toolbox, its more colorful. More like a giant crayon box. The one with the built in sharpener. Today I need red and next week, I may want yellow and orange!
I love this. I now want to do some colouring 🤣. In all seriousness, sometimes I find art is my way of resting. I am no artist, but I sometimes have a play, and get swept away by that and distracted from everything else in a wonderful way!
It's exactly that - meeting yourself where you're at, and knowing that it can change day to day, hour to hour. It's back to the strength of our intuition and allowing ourselves to believe that we do know our bodies and our needs ❤️
This was such a great interview. As someone who has multiple physical and mental health issues going on (and oh, the shame of being constantly disbelieved!) AND who is ambitious and wants to do things, this resonated with me a lot. From one Emma to another - thank you!
Oh Emma you are SO welcome. The disbelief thing is ongoing although I don't have those people around me any more. I still come up against it in the medical profession as we all do, we can but hope that more understanding will come. It's ok for us to be ambitious and driven, we don't need to let that go just because we are ill. There is always another way. Sending much love to you ❤️
Can't wait to listen. And loving your reframe of 'cool and interesting' to describe us AI types 😄 There certainly seem to be a lot of us hanging out here on Substack.... perhaps because the rest of the world can be a bit too overwhelming at times!
Gosh this was perfect. Resonated so strongly with me, though I'm a male living with chronic illness, I also collect my own list of "shoulds", and "meditate" has come and gone from that list several times, but it just doesn't work for me, and I've finally come to accept that it's ok, that not being able to meditate or get benefit from it isn't a problem in me or how I'm doing it or whatever. We each have our own path to wellness, support, and self-care; we each have our own limitations; I have to remind myself over and over and over that it is ok to be the me that I am today, and that it's ok to do what I can do. Thank you so much for writing this piece!
I love this segment. The title "very ambitious and very ill" resonates so deep within me, I almost cried just seeing the email.
Thank you Emma, for sharing your story. And thank you, Rachel, for capturing it for us. <3
<3
It’s crazy how many women I’ve met for whom that phrase resonates
That both saddens and inspire me. I suppose that comes as no surprise.
Oh Elizabeth, we are not alone. I almost cried when I saw the title myself! I'm so touched that this resonated with you, thank you for your lovely comment ❤️
Every letter feels like a spark that brings me back to myself. This letter today is so aptly timed in my personal life of having founded a magazine and after three issues, choosing to close it. Finding acceptance that my illness does require me to choose between the things I love is grief and gratitude colliding. You feature so many wonderful and interesting women who struggle in the same way as I do. It makes me feel like my illness doesn't have to be all I see of myself.
I love the way you say “choosing to close it”. Empowering yourself in and amidst the thick of your own story.
The choices we make at times like this are not always the choices we necessarily want or envisaged ourselves making.
exactly!
I looove that phrase: grief and gratitude colliding.
isn't it wonderful
Yes I totally feel that 'grief and gratitude' experience. It's a hard one to accept at times, and it's ok to grieve what we have lost. Sometimes it makes me feel deeply sad, but more often I feel glad to live in a different way. Without having 'lost' my career, and all that went along with it, I would not have found writing, this community, and wonderful people who share such similar life experiences. I would have continued battling in a world that didn't quite fit. We are so much more than our illnesses, but we are also connected deeply in our shared understanding ❤️
yes, exactly, Emma! I'm often reminding myself that my illness does not get to take my entire identity hostage, and over time, writing has been a way to walk myself back to who I am, even if it looks a bit different now
Sound healing is my favorite way to get into a calm and relaxed state.
A wellness practice that doesn’t work for me is any kind of fasting.
Yes! Fasting makes me hangry! Also I’ve heard casually that studies on fasting (unsurprisingly) regularly don’t feature female subjects, and the female body may react very differently than the male body. I haven’t looked into this but seems totally possible.
Fasting and sound baths send me spiraling but binaural sounds and as of this week green noise work really well. Its interesting what resonates with us and what doesnt.
And that’s why experimentation requires listening to our OWN reaction versus what’s “supposed” to happen.
ooh I now need to look up 'binaural sounds' and green noise - is green noise the sounds of the outdoors? Nature?
I love sound healing. It gives me something to focus on, and I do feel that within my whole body ❤️
Aah thanks so much Rachel, it was a joy speaking with you. It’s very spooky that this has come out today as I’m on holiday - and actually had a couple of pre-scheduled posts. Today’s one is all about larks vs owls and my acceptance that I am not a morning person. Look forward to listening to this! I’m very grateful to have been invited for the conversation 💕🙏
It was an absolute joy!
Thank you Rachel and Emma for a rich conversation. Although I am mostly a lark, I strongly believe that for Ladies (& others) with Illness less ‘should’ is the tonic to apply. If your body wants to be an owl, then have at it. Ditto for meditation or controlled breathing or eating greens! I know someone whose GI issues were made worse by her attempt to eat greens, when she needed a low residue diet (at the time). Glad to hear so many different versions of what works, and all presented with a cautious ‘well this is what’s working for me just now’ rather than a universal prescription. Yay fir your book, Emma.
Less should! So easy to say, so hard to do (for me).
Me too, Rachel
Thank you lovely, and that is the only 'less' we need... less shoulds. Amen to that 🙏
Loved loved loved listening to this! I’m a huge fan of Emma Simpson after discovering her on here. Brilliant to hear her voice. I haven’t listened to my own yet on here but I really want to.
A wellness practice that I haven’t taken to (even though i know it would help and I have used it in times of desperation 😆) is nostril breathing (as in the one where you press your finger on one nostril and breathe through one at a time). It’s really good for resting, helping you sleep - apparently 🙃
For me the whole wellness practice is about meeting yourself where you’re at, listening to your body, doing what you can when you can. Not what the wellness industry tells you you should be doing. That is something different entirely.
Yes! Its a toolbox we can pick and choose from. Its when the shoulds comes in that it gets on my nerves. We are all so different. Not a toolbox, its more colorful. More like a giant crayon box. The one with the built in sharpener. Today I need red and next week, I may want yellow and orange!
I love this. I now want to do some colouring 🤣. In all seriousness, sometimes I find art is my way of resting. I am no artist, but I sometimes have a play, and get swept away by that and distracted from everything else in a wonderful way!
Thats great. Play is so healing!
It really is!!
It's exactly that - meeting yourself where you're at, and knowing that it can change day to day, hour to hour. It's back to the strength of our intuition and allowing ourselves to believe that we do know our bodies and our needs ❤️
This was such a great interview. As someone who has multiple physical and mental health issues going on (and oh, the shame of being constantly disbelieved!) AND who is ambitious and wants to do things, this resonated with me a lot. From one Emma to another - thank you!
I’m so glad it resonated Emma - there are a ton of women in this category, it seems!
And thank you to you too, Rachel. I’m working my way through your posts and podcasts and finding your Substack so valuable.
Oh Emma you are SO welcome. The disbelief thing is ongoing although I don't have those people around me any more. I still come up against it in the medical profession as we all do, we can but hope that more understanding will come. It's ok for us to be ambitious and driven, we don't need to let that go just because we are ill. There is always another way. Sending much love to you ❤️
Can't wait to listen. And loving your reframe of 'cool and interesting' to describe us AI types 😄 There certainly seem to be a lot of us hanging out here on Substack.... perhaps because the rest of the world can be a bit too overwhelming at times!
Haha yes maybe that’s it, a slightly less overwhelming venue
I am going to have 'cool and interesting' as my epitaph 🤣
Gosh this was perfect. Resonated so strongly with me, though I'm a male living with chronic illness, I also collect my own list of "shoulds", and "meditate" has come and gone from that list several times, but it just doesn't work for me, and I've finally come to accept that it's ok, that not being able to meditate or get benefit from it isn't a problem in me or how I'm doing it or whatever. We each have our own path to wellness, support, and self-care; we each have our own limitations; I have to remind myself over and over and over that it is ok to be the me that I am today, and that it's ok to do what I can do. Thank you so much for writing this piece!